Friday, July 23, 2010

The Joy of Smell - and lobster bisque

So…the human sense of smell is a wonderful thing. Scent can affect moods, taste, feelings, etc.

What I find to be most interesting is how deceiving the sense of smell is. Ever been to the Canterbury Hotel in downtown Indianapolis??? Beautiful place. Gorgeous old hotel, old decorations, marble, wallpaper that appears to be from the turn of the century…there is a charm there. They have a restaurant that has changed its name so many times I am not exactly sure of the name of it now, however the menu thankfully hasn’t changed. If you are ever in the mood for orgasmic lobster bisque, THIS is the place you want to go. The lobster bisque is around $6-$8 for a bowl, and while you may think it to be expensive, it is the cheapest orgasm I have ever paid for.

BUT –
the point is, the bar/restaurant area has the old heavy woodwork, dim, mood lighting surrounding the local artist paintings that hang on the walls of the restaurant…it is a pleasure to dine at the Canterbury even if you don’t get the opportunity to stay there.

The restaurant in the Canterbury has restrooms located off the entrance, and they do not disappoint either, in appearance. You walk into a single door, and down a dimly lit hallway with the dark, crown molding and antique wallpaper, descending upon your door of choice to relieve yourself. Of course, I have never been into the men’s restroom, but I have to say, when you walk into the woman’s, that is where the charm stops, as soon as you breathe. For some inexplicable reason, this restroom is warm and smells like the dirty, bottom-feeding part of a sewer. Which is SO mind-boggling to me because this restroom continues along the pattern of the rest of the Canterbury, possessing a victorian charm not found in too many places. But being in this bathroom, I stifle the urge to vomit up my orgasmic lobster bisque because of the wretched smell of old ass. And perhaps, maybe that is what management is going for…the victorian charm of aged ass. Needless to say, it is rather difficult to fully enjoy the experience at the Canterbury because I know, for a fact, I am going to have to go to the bathroom at SOME point while dining there, and I will be unable to avoid the old ass smell.

On the other hand, when I lived on the south side of Indy, I frequented the Walmart on 31 south. Now, this was not a new Walmart; actually it was rather old and had to do renovations when they began building the Walmart Supercenters. This Walmart…was, well, like any other Walmart I suppose. The clientele was questionable (yes, I AM including myself in the generalization TYVM!), the quality of the products there was ho-hum – in fact, one could even say it was…dirty. The floor, the people, the overall appearance of the place was just…eh. Seriously, you walk in to the bathroom there, and the corners of the floor are black with dirt, there was never any toilet paper and if there was, it was balled up in the last stall clogging the last working toilet. No soap in the sinks, paper towels wet and ‘iffy’…if I was to say you would want to go in there wearing plastic gloves, I am paying them a compliment.

BUT

You walk into this filth-infested grunge house, and smell, and dear Lord it smells SO fresh and clean!!!! It absolutely astounds me how wonderful it smells in this place. I remember years ago, the first time I ever went in there, I held my nose as I walked in, did the “breathe through the mouth” thing. While taking care of business though, I accidentally smelled and I was shocked at how wonderful it smelled in there! You could actually almost say that the way the place smells beats the fact the way the place looks, as if it cancels it out…makes it ok.

I honestly think, if you walked in there blindfolded, you would have no idea how dirty the place is…and in fact, you would think it was pleasant to be in BECAUSE of the smell.

Ironically, if you were to conduct the same experiement at the Canterbury restaurant bathroom, I think you would imagine you were in the bowels of Indianapolis.
As I said, smell is a wonderful thing, in how it can affect your moods and the way you think. It can bring pain, lol, such as the smell of burnt popcorn in an elevator (some dude at work does this constantly – IT’S NOT LIKE WE CAN’T TELL DUDE!!!!) or the gal that wears the old lady mosquito repellent perfume, and you taste it whenever you walk where she had trod…or it can bring pleasure…fresh coffee brewing, the apple peach crumb tart baking in the over that I made the other day, the handsome friend of mine that sweats too much but damn but if he doesn’t smell good when he does!!!! (Sorry, I may need a moment here…)

I think presentation is everything, but it is not just things you can see. Presentation encompasses things you cannot see, but what you can smell.


Oh hell.... at least go try the orgasmic lobster bisque….

LMS

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